Most leaders are actually narcissists, which can backfire. Is yours?
As I looked at the turnover trends in my report, "Reason No. 5" pointed back to the CEO. While he was a brilliant visionary with an impressive executive background, he was a lousy leader with the classic features of narcissism, as described by former employees.
We see egomaniacs everywhere now--placed in positions of power and
influence by company owners and boards who reward the wrong people for
privileged roles.
In his phenomenal new book, Why Do So Many Incompetent Men Become Leaders? (And How to Fix It), Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic
explains how the features we normally associate with desirable
leadership traits--like confidence and charisma--can later become
narcissism and even psychopathy and backfire.
How to spot narcissists
In a recent episode of the Love in Action podcast, I asked Chamorro-Premuzic to share with me how anyone can recognize when he or she is working for a boss with narcissist tendencies.
In
differing degrees, he told me, narcissists lack empathy, have a strong
desire to break rules and defy the status quo, are likely to engage in
manipulation to advance themselves at the cost of others, and are
socially skillful with aggressive underpinning motives.
More specifically, here's how you'll know in a matter of minutes whether you're working with, or for, a narcissist:
1. They often crave validation.
Narcissists
are known for having high self-esteem and a superiority complex, yet
they suffer from a fragile ego derived from their own inner insecurity.
Put it all together, and you'll be working with or for a person who
often craves validation and recognition from others. This shouldn't come
as a surprise. "If you are constantly showing off," says
Chamorro-Premuzic, "you are probably desperate for others' admiration,"
which is rarely the case with humble people.
2. They are self-centered.
Narcissists
are less interested in other people--their ideas, insights, feedback,
or suggestions--because they have an empathy deficit. Don't expect any
trace of genuine consideration for others, only for themselves.
Furthermore, a high-level leader's narcissism can be detected by the
"size and attractiveness of their corporate profile picture, the number
of times they are mentioned in their organization's brochures and press
releases, and the frequency with which they use the word 'I' and other
self-referential pronouns," says Chamorro-Premuzic.
3. They expect special privileges.
Narcissists
feel entitled to certain privileges that their peers may not have, and
for which they justify exploitative behavior to get. They may think or
say: "Do I really need to apply for a promotion?" "Do I need to wait in
line?" Chamorro-Premuzic explains that when you think you're better than
those you work with, "you perceive unfairness where there is none and
behave in demeaning and condescending ways toward people."
4. They blame others for their mistakes.
Since
narcissists have a fierce resistance against negative feedback, they
are quick to cast blame grenades at other people when issues should be
pointing back at them. When their ears are open to critical
feedback, expect an aggressive reaction, because narcissists retaliate
rather than use the feedback to improve. "To make matters worse, these
tendencies are exacerbated by narcissists' impulsive nature," says
Chamorro-Premuzic. He adds that because of their poor self-control,
"narcissists have trouble sustaining any development or self-improvement
initiative."
In conclusion, while a narcissist is more likely to
become a leader because of traits we identify as successful for the job
(charisma and confidence), those very traits will evolve into their
darker counterparts--overconfidence, narcissism, and psychopathy--which
will get the person fired.
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